Some years back I was at a yard sale and a book caught my eye - Thin Within by Judy Wardell. ‘By the way, I like her older version.’
This well-written and thought-out book took me through many layers of healing. Friend, no question about it, Thin Within gave me an aligned way to honor my body.
Yet, the one concept that I latched onto and applied to my life across the board and continue to do so, is the idea of pleasers and teasers.
So…
What Are Pleasers and Teasers?
Let’s take a look at a paraphrased definition.
A pleaser is a 10. It gives you complete satisfaction. It’s not something that you have to settle yourself with. No siree, it brings you pure delight.
Whereas a teaser is more like a 3. It’s okay. It will do, but it doesn’t completely satisfy. And most of the time it leaves you wanting more.
It’s the difference between good and great.
Think chips vs. a delicious meal, good movie vs. great movie, okay job vs. an amazing job, settled relationship vs. fulfilling relationship, passable outfit vs. striking outfit… you get the picture.
I’ll take great over good any day. Wouldn’t you?
More Pleasers, Please
Since the reading of Thin Within, I have made it a practice to peruse my life with these questions - Am I settling anywhere? Am I allowing any teasers into my life?
I’m happy to share that from my many years of asking these questions, there is no need for deliberating. The questions come out and I immediately know where my teasers are.
My teasers have shown up in the most unforeseen ways - with my clothes, my office, a friendship, food, my car, and a trip.
It’s a joy to share that when I become aware of a teaser in my life, I happily ask, “How can I make that into a pleaser?”
Sometimes there is an easy solution. Maybe I just need to tweak a bit. However, there have been times when a teaser takes more than just a little tweaking.
Regardless of whether it’s a tweaking situation or a change-the-whole-thing situation, the question remains, am I willing to turn this teaser into a pleaser?
I like the idea of grabbing hold of this thought from Judy Wardell, “I have very simple tastes. I choose only pleasers.”
Deep Dive With Pleasers
I’m thrilled that I have discovered another way of using pleasers.
I now think of pleasers beyond that which meets the eye.
I’ve taken a deep dive with pleasers.
I’m using pleasers/teasers as unconditional love vs. conditional love.
Dear, I’m using pleasers as a way of Being Love. ‘Like to read more about being love?’
Here’s how…
When I interact with others I think, give a pleaser ‘unconditional love’ not a teaser ‘conditional love.’
I’m having so much fun! And I’m connecting in a deeper more soul-satisfying way.
I notice when I think the thought - give a pleaser - my heart opens and I feel a wave of love even with strangers.
Truth is, I’m overjoyed that my interactions appear to carry a magical allure. I’m sure it’s from the love that is deeply felt.
I like this Being Love stuff. ❤️😊
“Love is a bond that transcends all boundaries, connecting hearts across time, distance, and difference.”– Kahlil Gibran, The Prophet (1923)
Infinite Rewards
There are infinite rewards when we are willing to open our hearts to unconditional, real love - the best pleaser ever!
Some of these are:
Genuine, lasting happiness
A profound sense of peace and fulfillment
Joy from telling the truth about yourself and others
Delight of Loving others
Happiness that comes from Being Seen and Loved
If you’d like to share unconditional love with others, we’d love to have you with us as we fill our lives with pleasers in the Supreme Love Course.
You can comment here with yes or email me at gloriaboysal@gmail.com and I’ll put you on the list.
Details will be given next week.
Feel a heart-pull to take the course, I have a promise for you.
My Promise
With my Unconditional Love, my intuitive connecting gift, and my deep compassion I will get to the core of whatever is standing between you living a genuinely happy life filled with Unconditional Love.
Ready to take your own deep dive?
Inner Joy Compass Prompt:
Take in a nice, big heart breath. Remind yourself that wherever you’re at in your life, is the perfect platform to continue forth from.
You may want to take a thoughtful moment or two.
If so inclined, you may want to write down your answers.
Now let’s begin.
Is there anywhere in my life I am settling for a teaser when I could have a pleaser?
If I recognize a teaser, the first step I can take to transform it into a pleaser is _________________.
A small shift I can make to ensure my presence is a pleaser—offering warmth, kindness, and genuine connection - I will_______________________________.
To stay more mindful of choosing pleasers in both a tangible and intangible way I will _________________________.
“Love doesn’t discriminate; it embraces all beings, reminding us of our shared humanity.” – Bell Hooks, All About Love: New Visions (2000)
Thanks so much for hanging out with me.
I appreciate YOU.
With all my love,
Gloria