Thanksgiving - The Sharing of GEMS
A Simple Way
As the years pass by I experience a more nuanced Thanksgiving.
As a carefree youngster, Thanksgiving meant days off from school, great food, being with my grandparents and other relatives, and the anticipation of Christmas.
Today’s Thanksgiving is layered with the hustle and bustle of preparations, reflective moments, traditions, relaxation, and for some of us, joy mixed with grief. (Supportive post for those of you grieving)
Friend, my hope is that how I’m choosing to bring Grace into my many-layered Thanksgiving will support you with yours.
Back in the day when I taught parenting classes, there was a technique I shared that assisted families in bonding with each other.
This surprisingly simple technique gives one the gift of being fully present to experience a moment with a loved one (or not so loved one) more deeply. (Or compassionately)
It’s called a GEM - a Genuine Encounter Moment.
GEMS - A Way of Grace
Here’s how it works. (I’ve added some steps to create a deeper bonding.)
Don’t let the simplicity of it fool you, it’s powerful!
Stop what you’re doing when someone wants your attention or when you approach someone.
Make eye contact and really listen.
As you’re listening breathe in your heart to hear what is truly being said.
Show up fully and completely with your whole self.
Be childlike and evoke your curiosity. What is this person really trying to tell me?
Ask open-ended questions (Questions that don’t require a yes or no).
If you’re talking with a child, get down on their level. Don’t hover above them. Eye-to-eye is the way.
Dear, you may feel you don’t have time to fully show up, especially with the demands of Thanksgiving, I get it. I too have felt that way. But believe it or not, you’ll actually take less time.
I bet you can remember a time when you tried to give someone your partial attention. Not a good feeling for you or them. When you’re trying to do something else while trying to be with them, don’t you feel bothered by them?
No need to feel bothered. Take a GEM moment and really be with them and you’ll immediately feel better. By the way, so will they.
Friend, the GEM even works with our animals.
Take my cat, Tiger, for instance. He will follow me around and meow until I stop what I’m doing and spend time with him. After I pick him up and whisper words of love, he’s off to sleep or off to play with his toys. But if I continue to do what I’m doing and only give him my partial attention, he’ll continue to meow at me. Only my full attention will do.
Dearest, I truly believe that being fully present to those we’re with this holiday can be our gift of Grace.
Let’s Remember We All Deserve a GEM
Okay, instead of an Inner Joy Compass Prompt this week, I’m sharing an Inner Joy Challenge because we all deserve a GEM.
Here it is: Inner Joy Challenge
When you go to the bathroom and you’re washing your hands, stop.
Look into the mirror and meet yourself, eye-to-eye. It’s your GEM time.
Say out loud, “I appreciate you.” Breathe. Feel. Smile.
Imagine this - You’re busy with Thanksgiving either preparing the meal or a portion of the meal, or you’re preparing to travel, you’re trying your best to give out GEMS, and then you have the need, as we all do, to go to the bathroom.
How does it feel to stop and meet yourself with a GEM? “I appreciate you.”
Dearest, may you breathe easily and gracefully during this holiday season with all its many layers, and may you enjoy all the GEMS!
I wish you and yours a Happy and Blessed Thanksgiving.
I appreciate YOU.
With all my love,
Gloria