My Misguided Belief About Time

The First Half

Nov 19, 2024

Ever feel like time is closing in on you?

Ever feel the pressure of time so much that the past, present, and future, feel as if they are all demanding your attention at once?

I sure have!

My Misguided Belief About Time

I’m in my 30s. You know the age where you think you’ve arrived as an adult.

Well, the very adult me, decided to make the best use of, what I believed to be, my limited time.

Here’s my story:

With one hand on the steering wheel, one hand biting into a piece of chicken, and an eye averting at my index cards, I thought…okay… plan in motion, I’ll drive, eat, and study. (I had an upcoming test, and I had to be prepared.)

It had been a celebratory weekend (a camping trip in honor of my friend’s wedding) and my tired body yearned to rest while my anxious mind needed to…get things done!

So, on a beautiful spring afternoon deep in the hills of Mountain Home Arkansas, surrounded by maple and oak trees, I laid out my study notes on the passenger’s seat and began my drive home to St. Louis. I stopped for a bite to eat at a local café and feeling the need to get going I got a take-out. While driving, eating, and studying, in the hilly backwoods I noticed a sign that read: Loose gravel – Drive safely. I thought…Hmm, I have to be careful.

As I took my eyes off the road to reach down for my chicken, my wheels swerved off the side of the road onto the loose gravel. Without much thought or concern, I turned my steering wheel to the left to direct my tires back onto the pavement.

But my car began swerving to the left and right. I could not get control!

Panic grabbed my complete attention.

In minutes that felt like hours, my car flipped over down the embankment and turned over again and again…a full three flips. With each turn, my body was pushed against the roof of the car. At one upside-down point, in pure alarm, I cried …Oh my God, this is it!

And then my car stopped and landed upright, all I could hear was my pounding heart. Silence hung in the air.

In shock and whimpering… A vision of a movie I watched with an exploding car came flashing before my eyes, l was sure it was foreshadowing my future. Something snapped in me, I have to get out, now!

Full of terror and with an adrenaline rush, I pushed one door and then the other, they were jammed shut. Almost to the point of hysteria, I noticed that the back glass was completely shattered; I scrambled over the seats and crawled out the window.

Paralyzed, sitting on the trunk of my smashed-up car, I quietly whimpered… I want to go home.

Help Arrives

Although I was out in the middle of nowhere, as I looked up I saw an elderly man wobbling over to me. Not moving a muscle, glassy-eyed I stared at him, as he slowly made his way. When he reached me I heard myself say, in my most childish voice, “I want to go home.”

He asked me if I was okay. I shrugged, and when I did I noticed that my neck hurt.

To Make a Long Story Short

Friend, I was for the most part, okay. Not a broken bone. I did have to wear a neck brace for a while. And TMJ became a problem. But, hey, I flipped my car three times, and I lived.

My Message About Time

I believe it was a couple of days after the accident, safe at home and comfortably sleeping in my warm bed that I had a dream. ‘Well, that’s what I called it at the time.’

However, now I would say that I had an otherworldly experience.

My Experience

I see myself walking quickly along a country rock road. It’s a spring day and there are woods all around me. I’m not sure why I’m walking quickly but something seems to be calling me to hurry.

Out of nowhere, Jesus appears in front of me. Surprised, I halt. He stares at me with his luminescent eyes. I stare back.

Without saying a word he turns and slowly begins walking away from me. As I watch him walk away, I stand there perplexed. My mind is reeling with questions, why is Jesus here? Am I supposed to do something? Or ask him something? But then I somehow know I’m supposed to follow him.

With my quickness, I catch up with him. Neither of us speaks. As I slowly walk beside him, I feel impatient. I have a sense of urgency pulling at me, and I want to hurry along. But, intuitively I know that I’m not to bypass him.

I notice how he pays attention to his surroundings and pauses to reflect. His enjoyment is undeniable.

But I am antsy.

As we get to the end of the road, he stops. So, I stop. I’m so impatient that it’s all I can do to not stomp my foot, I think, now what?

After what feels like a long time, Jesus turns and looks at me. I have the uncanny feeling that he sees inside me and knows everything there is to know about me.

With piercing eyes, he states, “You believe you do not have enough time. If you continue to believe you do not have enough time, you will create not having enough time. You are to know you have plenty of time. Time is endless. You must stop and take the time to experience your life.”

He picks up a wildflower, sniffs it, and smiles.

I began seeing images of myself hurrying from one activity to another. I then hear Jesus’ voice again, “You must know you have time. You always have plenty of time. Time is endless.”

I wake myself up shouting, “I get it, God, I get it!”

Today

That “dream” has never left me. My experience was so lifelike that the realness of it became a part of me.

I began enjoying my life more and the people in it. I began appreciating my surroundings. I began seeing life instead of rushing through it.

I stopped doing three or more things at a time. I found that one at a time was much more peaceful.

My life changed. I changed.

I’d like to tell you that I always remember and heed that powerful time message, but as humans do, I still sometimes fall short.

However, it doesn’t take me long to turn my compass back in the right direction, back toward truth - I have plenty of time, after all, time is endless.

“I have all the time in the world from life to life to do what is to do, to do what is done, to do the timeless doing.” Jack Kerouac

How About YOU?

What do you think about my story? Can you relate?

Do you find yourself trying to do numerous things at once?

Ready to discover your perception of time?

Okay, since the first step to change is awareness, let’s amp up our joy by bringing awareness to our perceptions.

Inner Joy Compass Prompt:

How do you typically experience time in your daily life? Do you feel like you have enough time, or do you often feel rushed or stressed?
Do you believe that there is a "right" or "wrong" way to experience time? Why or why not?
How do you balance the need to plan and schedule your time with the desire to live in the present moment?
Have you ever tried to intentionally slow down or speed up your perception of time? What was your experience like?

“Once we discover how to appreciate the timeless values in our daily experiences, we can enjoy the best things in life.” Jerome K. Jerome

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